A is for Anger (Secondary)

Identify the problem with Anger

Dealing with difficulty is a key aspect of resilience. And emotions play an important part in this. It’s really important to understand that all emotions & feelings are messages. Our job is to understand them and then decide what to do next.

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Deal with Anger

The good news is that you can train your brain to do something about your anger with this simple three-step process. Worth noting, there’s no time limit in each stage, just go through them at your own pace, you’re the expert in you

Resilience Tactics

• Firstly recognise that you’re angry. Call it what it is. This is called attuning & when you name an emotion, you’re on your way to making some sort of sense about it. Notice how anger feels in the body. What sensations are there? You don’t need to solve the anger immediately, you just to need to know what it is that you’re feeling. It is what it is.

Take a few slow, deep breaths in and out, feel your feet on the floor - you’ve got this

• Now you know what you’re dealing with, the second step is to be with the anger, recognise you’re not alone & reach out for help. You don’t have to be afraid of anger, stuck in it or swept away by it. But you can take control of how you experience and express your emotions. And you can remind yourself that it’s ok to feel this and to recognise you might need some help to deal with this, that is difficult ! Ask yourself what do I need right now to help myself, how can I make a plan to get help, who might help?

Above all be kind to yourself & try not to judge yourself for getting angry

• Our third step is to take back the reins, to shift out of the negative and pivot towards the positive. To help your brain move out of its negativity bias and to choose to respond flexibly. You can find a way through the anger, the difficulty and come out the other side, one step at a time. Notice how someone has been kind or supportive, remind yourself that good things also happen.

Notice & be with these feelings too. Savour them. Brains are complex and complicated but they literally can’t hold the anger and joy in the same space at the same time.

With this process you’re learning and re-learning how to be with difficulty and not be overwhelmed by it. How to deal with challenges and find a path through. Being with and choosing how we respond is a key feature of developing our resilience.

“Anger is one of our more powerful emotions and it can be super-positive, motivating us to take action. Unresolved anger can also fester away, sometimes leading to frustration & resentment. ”

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The not-so-small small print

There is none! Simply return to this part of the website daily to get the next part of this program. No payment or subscription required. This is a resource we are sharing with all of you through the website and aiming to help our youngsters, in the various stages of their lives. This program contains information and practices that are aimed for two different age groups and we intend to mostly post the primary level information in the morning and the secondary level in the afternoon. Please leave us a comment and let us know how you are getting on or get in touch if you require additional support. If you want to be notified of new content, courses and free resources subscribe to our mailing list.

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