N is for No Thanks! (Primary)
No, Maybe, No, Definitely Maybe, But NO
Sometimes when we say no, we think we’re being difficult, that our friends might like us less, we might even get told off for it! Sometimes when we say no, we actually want to say yes but we’re scared & make up an excuse! Being clear on what we want to say is all part of being resilient.
Fun things to practice
With practice, we can train our brains to know what to say and do, let’s take a look at some options:
1. Say no with kindness! Saying no to something because you really don’t want to or can’t do it, can seem harsh but we can soften it by being kind. Imagine yourself saying ‘thanks so much for asking, I just can’t do this right now’. You haven’t actually said the word no but you’ve got your message across kindly and gently!
2. You can leave the door open to something if you’re not quite ready! If you want to say yes but need more time, your no might sound something like ‘Thanks! I’d love to do this, I just need a bit more time to sort things out, can I come back to you?’ You’ve still said no without using the word no, you’ve bought yourself some more thinking time
3. Sometimes we just don’t know what to say! Is it a NO or is it a YES?!?!
If this happens to you a lot, take a moment
Feel your feet on the floor
Take a deep breath in - count to
Practise saying yes - how do you feel?
Practice saying no - how does this feel?
Sometimes our bodies and our minds just need a moment to get in touch with how we really feel. Giving ourselves some time, some space, can often let the answer make itself known to us. Sometimes this is called getting in touch with our intuition, our gut instinct.
And if this still doesn’t work, be honest & say ‘I really don’t know what to say at the moment!’
The not-so-small small print
There is none! Simply return to this part of the website daily to get the next part of the practice.. No payment or subscription required. This is a resource we are sharing with all of you through the website and aiming to help our youngsters, in the various stages of their lives. This program contains information and practices that are aimed for two different age groups and we intend to mostly post the primary level information in the morning and the secondary level in the afternoon. Please leave us a comment and let us know how you are getting on or get in touch if you require additional support.
Z is for Zebra, Summer Resilience Program Final Entry (Primary) with thanks to Brene Brown & Greater Good Science Centre at UCLA Berkeley Youth for their ‘zebra’ advice & to Education Scotland for their inspiration for this programme x